uh uhm ok

1. I just spent the last hour going through Miley Cyrus’ Twitter account for some reason.

2. I have a job in the ad world now and I really like it. I get paid to write, there is a lot of food, and everyone understands my jokes.

3. I drew Ron Burgundy above my desk today, but it turned out as a mix of Ron Burgundy and Ron Swanson from Parks & Rec. One of the junior art directors said I should be an art director too but I said “nope, good joke.” COOL 

4. When I was in 8th grade I tried to steal a ring from the hip, new Forever 21 store at the Annapolis Mall but I couldn’t go through with it. I felt so guilty that I bought it and $10 worth of other stuff to make up for it. I STILL FEEL BAD WHEN I THINK ABOUT IT

5. I get physically irritated and slightly nauseous when I go to my parents’ house and see their Dell computer from 2005. My dad still runs AOL as a browser and my mom does not know how to send emails other than on her Blackberry. WHY

6. I listened to nothing but Jessie J’s Who You Are album for the past four days. I ended that streak today when I put on The Click Five’s “Just the Girl” because it popped into my head and I had to you guys, I just had to.

7. I have one full Shakespearean monologue memorized (Hamlet’s soliloquy, Act II, Sc. 2) and several mostly memorized, plus bits and pieces here and there. I used to know Romeo & Juliet completely by heart, and I was almost 100% on Hamlet, but I decided to focus on my art and writing instead of acting.

8. I’ve never been to Disney World or the West Coast, and I’ve never been on a cruise ship. My family never took cool vacations. I’ve been to Pittsburgh (always), Upstate Pennsylvania, Hershey Park and Niagara Falls but that’s it in terms of vacations.

9. Celine Dion’s “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now” makes me cry every goddamn time I hear it and I don’t know why. It’s about Wuthering Heights, which I’ve cried over while reading, so that might factor into it, but who knows. I do not usually cry during songs or books but for some reason these get me.

10. In high school I had a dream where I drank Lemon-Lime Gatorade in a white room for hours. When I woke up, I craved Lemon-Lime Gatorade, so my saint of a mother bought me a case from Sam’s Club and I drank the entire thing (12 bottles) in one day, and for two whole years, whenever I was thirsty, I only drank water or Lemon-Lime Gatorade.

OK THERE YOU GO